I wasn't expecting this

[fluffymark]

It's very confusing and I'm a little bit scared. This journal thing. I've had this journal for just over a week now, and already virtually everyone I know has read it already. Often in great and glorious detail. Isn't that just a little scary? Heaven knows what Val thinks of all this (Hello Val if you're reading this!), her being the most prominent subject in the journal as it stands. It's like i'm running my own gossip column. About me.

I'm an exhibitionist. Aren't I?

Comments

[aiwendel.livejournal.com]

*strokes*
*smiles*

[fluffymark]

And you're an exhibitionist too young miss.

Re:

[aiwendel.livejournal.com]

:-P

private journal here!
i can't help it if random people go and find it...
and i have a cunning back up plan - i write so much pointless waffle that people won't bother to read the thing - so it really is private, obviously :)

[fluffymark]

Obviously I won't read it. Unfortunately for you, I have. All of it. Every word.

Mainly to work out who you are! But I know now. Hello Tish. *waves*

[aiwendel.livejournal.com]

somehow i don't quite believe you...
but you still have me slightly worried...
grrrr
will have to start posting everything as private or something...
have a cunning 'imaginary friends' group for random people i'll never meet, which is a good start for more dodgy stuff....
so... there really won't be anything worth reading there :-P

hope you're well though,
and nice to see you :)
*kisses*

[fluffymark]

Ok, maybe not *every* word. But far too many. You have an awful lot of words. Do you do this stream of gibberish thing all the time? :)

Re:

[aiwendel.livejournal.com]

yep.... in case you haven't noticed w the volume of nonsense comments...
best be ignored...
prime procrastination device of the day...
ho hum...

[fluffymark]

I use livejournal to avoid procrastinating ;)

Re:

[aiwendel.livejournal.com]

lol!
:-P

[eveilena.livejournal.com]

You're talking mainly to people who aslo have LJs and therefore by your criteria are also exhibitionists so we're hardly going to mind :)

I think it shows confidence to have an LJ and you should probably be proud of that.

[fluffymark]

I'm not thinking about whether other people will mind my journal. After all, if they don't want to read it, then they don't read it.

I'm worried at how much personal stuff I'm actually willing to expose. And I'm just bemused at how many people now read it - True I told a few people (like you) about it at first, but I didn't expect everyone else to find it so soon.

Ah well. At least it keeps everyone up to date on my misadventures and saves me having to write a million long emails to everyone telling them what i'm up to.

Re:

[eveilena.livejournal.com]

Useful, isn't it? :)

Mmmm... I did get the wrong end of the stick there.

[fluffymark]

You were half correct though eve. It did take a lot of confidence to start this. As I've said elsewhere though, my life has reach a stage where I need outside analysis of my life. I need to know what I'm doing is good or not. I need to know what people like about me and what they don't like. Not that i'm submitting my life decisions to a 'peer review' type thing ort anything like that.

Most of all, its fun. I like this. *bounce*

Re:

[eveilena.livejournal.com]

Well, that's the idea *grin*

Yeah, I've found I've done quite a lot of approval-seeking on here as well, possibly more than I realised I was doing. The good thing though is that you generally don't get approval here that you don't deserve. There's a definite culture of bluntness in these parts.

[fluffymark]

Excellent. Thats just what i'm looking for. I want people to speak their mind. I *want* criticism. More than anything else.

[emarkienna.livejournal.com]

Quite a few ppl who don't have Livejournals themselves have read mine at various times, and it's not something I would have particularly expected. I think one has to assume that there's always the possibility that someone will know about your journal and perhaps be reading:)

Even if they aren't at the moment, there's always the possibility they will find out in future. If in doubt, make it a Friends Only entry:)

[fluffymark]

I'm fully aware of the need to make things 'friends only' or 'private'. There are some entires only I can read. Mainly things that involve *intimate* details of other peoples private lives that they would object to being made public on here.

Val was slightly alarmed at reading my journal - she got a lot more alarmed when she found out she was only reading the 'public' bits.

[the-lady-lily.livejournal.com]

I like being an exhibitionist like this. It means I can tell people what they may not want to hear out loud or I may not want to say... typing is so much easier than speaking. Besides - this way you know you're not telling anyone anything you don't want to, especially not involutarily under the influence of booze...

The other downside of LJs, of course, is that odd people you've only met the once badger you with long rambling comments in the morning before the tea has penetrated the muck surrounding their brains ;-)

[fluffymark]

You may be right about the booze thing. This is a controlled outlet for my need to be heard. I got into huge trouble about a year ago after drinking too much at the calling. Apparently (although I fail to recall this) I managed to tell kboyd about a few things that really shouldn't have reached her ears. The resulting mess was er...messy.

Of course, the downside may be that I could easily write a journal entry after drinking too much. In fact about half of them already have been written with teh help of a glass of red wine.

[the-lady-lily.livejournal.com]

Ah, but one can delete the drunken LJ posts and pretend they never happened... no one has any proof otherwise...

[fluffymark]

I'd forgotten about that! Wow, immunity from looking lke a complete prat in that way. I'm fortunate enough not to have had to resort to that yet :)

Eeeeeep

[(Anonymous)]

I do indeed wonder what on earth might be consealed in the "private" sections of your journal. Not that I was shocked, but surprised might be a better tern (and now terribly guilty, but no matter, I do guilt very well). Anyhow, you know you didn't HAVE to tell me the URL. Then I would NEVER have read your journal at all.

Which I think does make you an exhibitionist.

So ner :P

However, if you wish, I'll stop reading this if it makes you feel less inhibited when writing!

val

Re: Eeeeeep

[fluffymark]

True I didn't have to tell you the URL. But you were enquiring into exactly what I'd been telling people about you, and thats all the excuse I needed to send you here. But that's probably just an excuse to hide the real reason, that I'm an exhibiitonist. Or something.