Loneliness

[fluffymark]

The house feels cold and empty. I've lost my appetite, and have been flopping doing *nothing* (except crying) listening to depressive music all morning. I feel lost and directionless and lack the will to do anything i should be doing, like go out and find people to ease my loneliness. And now I've run out of words again to describe how i feel. If it continues like this I'm going to start writing poetry again, and that'll be bad news for everyone. I never thought it would get to me so much - and i'm swamped in emotion. I need someone, anyone, to hug me right now and tell me everything is ok and theres a world out there still and hold me while i get myself together again. At least I hope I pull myself together - its possible i could just completely fall to pieces over the next year. Just think about today though, if i survive the next few days the rest will be easy, right? But nobody is here. I'm feeling Lost. Empty. Lonely. Cold. Scared.

Thats decided me now. I'm going to the asylum fellowship later this afternoon. Maybe they can help me. If nothing else it will be company. Yay!